Time Quotations

The Quippery

6:15 in the morning! I’m not usually this upset until 10:00 A.M
– M.A.S.H –

A baby first laughs at the age of four weeks. By that time his eyes focus well enough to see you clearly.
– Unknown –

A good holiday is one spent among people whose notions of time are vaguer than yours.
– John B. Priestly –

Am writing an essay on the life-history of insects and have abandoned the idea of writing on “How Cats Spend their time.
– W.N.P. Barbellion –

And when asked, I can say, “Well, no, I don’t know what time it is, but if you’re lost, I can help you. Because I’m not.
– Robert Fulghum –

Cancer is part of my life. But it’s only my body that has cancer all the time. It’s okay for my spirit to be free from it once in a while.
– John Robert McFarland, Now That I Have Cancer I am Whole –

Childhood is a place as well as a time.
– May Sarton –

During a coffee break: “There must be something to reincarnation. It’s hard to believe that I could get this far behind in one lifetime.
– Robert Orben, Orben’s Current Comedy –

For disappearing acts, it’s hard to beat what happens to the eight hours supposedly left after eight of sleep and eight of work.
– Doug Larson –

Howard not only knew the story of Ferryland during his own family’s time, but he knew it, or felt it, as far back as history can go. That was a long way back since Ferryland is one of the places in Newfoundland where the patina of human occupation is thick enough to really soften the bony face of the old rock.
– Farley Mowat –

How did it get so late so soon?
― Dr. Seuss –

I see no advantage in these new clocks. They run no faster than the ones made 100 years ago.
– Henry Ford –

I try to take one day at a time, but sometimes several days attack me at once.
– Ashleigh Brilliant –

I write poetry not for publication but merely to kill time. Air planes are a good place to write poetry and then firmly throw it away. My collected works are mostly on the vomit bags of Pan American and TWA.
– Charles McCabe –

It’s no good running a pig farm badly for thirty years while saying, “Really I was meant to be a ballet dancer.” By that time, pigs will be your style.
– Quentin Crisp –

It’s a strange thing, but when you are dreading something, and would give anything to slow down time, it has a disobliging habit of speeding up.
– J.K. Rowling, “The Hungarian Horntail,” Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, 2000 –

It was always my belief that farmers developed strange theories of cause and effect because they spent too much time alone. A combination of incomplete information and a lack of critical review led to some odd conclusions. In the early days of farming, a reinforcing factor in all this was that horses seemed willing to accept almost any theory if it was accompanied by oats. It was a closed circle.
– Leonard G. Lee, Lee Valley Tools –

Life is easier if you dread only one day at a time.
– Charles M. Schulz –

Let not the sands of time get in your lunch.
– Tony Hendra –

Marrying a man is like buying something you’ve been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn’t always go with everything else in the house.
– Jean Kerr –

Middle age is that time of life when you can feel bad in the morning without having had fun the night before.
– Unknown –

More than anytime in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness, the other to total extinction. Let us pray that we have the wisdom to choose correctly.
– Woody Allen –

Segal’s Law: A man with one watch knows what time it is. A man with two watches is never sure.
– Author Unknown –

Strangely enough, this is the past that somebody in the future is longing to go back to.
– Ashley Brilliant –

Thank-you for our life together and for all the times in the past when you’ve understood when I forgot to say it… thank-you.
– Author Unknown –

The critical period in matrimony is breakfast time.
– A.P. Herbert, Uncommon Law, 1935 –

Three o’clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do.
– Jean-Paul Sartre (1905–1980), Nausea –

There’s never enough time to do all the nothing you want.
– Bill Watterson –

Time may be a great healer, but it’s a lousy beautician.
– Author Unknown –

Time, obviously, is relative. Two weeks on a vacation is not the same as two weeks on a diet.
– Author Unknown –

Time is what prevents everything from happening at once.
– John Archibald Wheeler –

Time is a figure eight, at its center the city of Déjà vu.
– Robert Brault –

Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.
― Anthony G. Oettinger –

Time’s fun when you’re having flies.
– Kermit the Frog –

Warning: retiree – knows it all and has plenty of time to tell you about it.
– Unknown –

Winter is that discouraging time of the year when the house uses more fuel than the car.
– Doug Larson –

When a man retires and time is no longer a matter of urgent importance, his colleagues generally present him with a watch.
– R.C. Sheriff –

When you are REAL, you don’t mind being hurt. It doesn’t happen all at once. You become, it takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t often happen to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are REAL, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are REAL you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.
– Margery Williams, The Velveteen Rabbit –

When told the reason for Daylight Saving time the old Indian said, “Only a white man would believe that you could cut a foot off the top of a blanket and sew it to the bottom of a blanket and have a longer blanket.”
– Unknown –

Why won’t they let a year die without bringing in a new one on the instant, can’t they use birth control on time?
– John Dos Passos, 1917 –

Woman to psychiatrist: “If my life were a movie, this is about the time I’d go to the snack bar.”
– Carrie Snow –